Lonley people dating
For most of my other birthdays I've stayed in my room and cried. I used to hang out with him every weekend and we had fun and we laughed a lot.
I've seen all these people I know go out with their friends and have fun and I get incredibly jealous. It was nice but it wasn't when I was happiest.
My self esteem is low nowadays though mostly because of serious work/sleep-related stress and being brought down with sadness over not having a relationship after vividly remembering moments of physical intimacy and emotional connection (plus shared interests we partook in together) with a girl I knew in the past.
I just think about how huge the universe actually is and I feel overwhelming happiness at the fact that there are billions and billions of stars and galaxy's out there.
It's not just lonliness but all those feelings with lonliness that I deal with.
I'm just some guy that really wants to cuddle and have sex and feel close to someone. Sorry if this isn't the right place to post this I just feel like I need to tell someone.
I will then come back home and go for a long walk and enjoy nature.
When I get back home I'm gonna grab a chair and sit myself in my garden and stargaze. I will do this on my own and apart from the intense anxiety I'll feel getting the train on my own I'm going to have the best birthday ever.
I've been meaning to write this for a while but like everything I've put it off. I mean I do have a Facebook and Instagram account but they're completely blank.